Oscar Wilde: Unnecessary Things

Parents, don't be alarmed, but I've spent the past week in the lap of luxury. Sort of.

In case you're not aware of English social stereotypes, let me enlighten you. During the unending lecture series we were forced to sit through as our "orientation", I did manage to pick up a few key facts:

1. English people love dogs.

2. Charles Darwin is a national hero- he's even on the money!

3. While the American vice is to cling to our divisions between races, the English flaw is hold on to the antiquated system of class separation.

I've learned about the lower class, or "working class" as it's called here, in the readings I've been doing in my classes. Tony Harrington, an English poet who writes primarily about his parents and his resentment for the upper echelons of society, has been one of the topics in my Postwar British and Irish Literature and Poetry class, and John Osborne's "Look Back in Anger" has been the major focus of my Postwar British Theatre class so far. Both of these writers express their anger towards the oppression they feel from the upper class and both do so with unbelievable eloquence. Good stuff. Revolutionary stuff.

But while I've been reading about the lower class, I feel like I've been living among the posh. The beauty of London, ladies and gentleman, is that you can do so while spending very little money.

First was a trip to the Natural History Museum. It's in an amazing building with unbelievable ceilings. There was a SUPER creepy exhibit about human development...let's just say, I came face to face with a giant fetus. While I would argue that it's not nearly as cool as it's New York equivalent, it was pleasant to spend a rainy day wandering around a museum, FO FREE! Yup, all of the museums in London are free entry. Just one of the cheap experiences you can have in London and still feel cultured.

Unfortunately my camera was dead, but here is a photo I stole from Lauren:

Dino!

Next on the agenda was a trip to Windsor Castle. Absolutely stunning. It's one of the Queen's spare castles, just in case hers breaks down or something. We took a pretty brief bus ride with an unbelievably annoying tour guide who was more concerned about where we could find toilets than what we were looking at. Upon arrival, we saw the spot where Charles and Camilla got married, a very crooked house, and a statue of Queen Victoria (which we'll come back to later...) The castle is perched up on top of a hill and is so gorgeous. No, the Queen was not there. Yes, we were sad to learn this.

Of course, almost the entire castle was closed. Because we're that lucky. We did see Queen Anne's Dollhouse, which is ridiculous. She was given it as a gift because she "had a love for miniature things". It has working electricity and plumbing. And it's big. And not a toy at all. Just a giant house to look at and not touch when you have a great enthusiasm for small objects. Kind of sounds like a torture device rather than a gift. But oh well.

We also saw some fancy china (I would make a joke about only using it when the Queen comes to visit, but that wouldn't really make sense...) and a pretty outstanding view. But that was really it. Even the chapel, St. George's Chapel, was off limits because it was a Sunday and there were services going on inside. So we decided to leave and get some lunch and do a little exploring.

Here's where the Queen Victoria statue comes back into my story. After our visit, we were supposed to meet at this statue at 1:45 to walk to Eton, a nearby town with a really fancy school and weird uniforms. I would tell you more about it, but I can't. Because I didn't get to go. When we obediently arrived at the statue at the set time, we discovered that everyone had already left without us. Thanks a lot guys. Luckily, karma struck back when they discovered that their walk was in vain because Eton was apparently extremely boring (as one would expect it to be on a Sunday when there's NO SCHOOL). So we all headed home a little disappointed with the trip. But we couldn't help feeling at least a little fancy having been to our first castle.

Once again, these photos are credited to Lauren's camera:

The castle

We had a lot of fun with the audio wands.

The Queen's yard.

The fanciness continued as, the next night, Allie and I went to the ballet, "The Sleeping Beauty". I'd never been to a ballet before (discounting the annual performance of The Nutcracker at my high school) and I'd certainly never been to an opera house. But after getting just a teensy bit lost (we still couldn't find it when we were standing 10 steps away from the front door), that's exactly where we ended up. In the very highest section of the Royal Opera House. The ballet was about 20 minutes too long (what was Puss in Boots doing, making a cameo in the last act?), and the dancers were a little too indulgent in their bows at the end, but overall the performance was really beautiful. The costumes were gorgeous and the arrangements of the dancers were really interesting. And above all, the space, the Opera House itself, was stunning. See for yourself.


Our final stop on the posh tour was to Harrods, where we just popped in to pick up a few things. Kidding. We were too scared to breathe on anything, let alone buy it. Not even a sandwich. We saw some £1200 puppies and some very unwearable shoes, then headed home. But it's definitely a place I'll return to once I recover from the sticker shock.

So here's the lesson of the week: Oscar Wilde was right when he said: "We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities." They are vital to the London experience. They are necessary to the cultural cultivation of our young and malleable minds.

And also, we're girls; we like shiny things.